All Or Nothing!

i have been lying in bed for days. i have been falling asleep on the small couch, huddled with the doggies, under a light weight blanket that i inherited from a dear friend. i think i had a virus. i had a headache and the chills. who knows? it may have been a reaction to my new remedy. on the other hand, the weather did turn cold here and we did have some winter 'like' days this week. i actually, got out of going to the clan for a double birthday party for gal's brother and sister earlier in the week. i simply was too cold to go out of the house in the late evening. the house is already, uncomfortably, cold. that's a problem with stone houses here in the holy city of zefat. they just aren't insulated and do not maintain any heat. i still haven't decided if i am going to use oil to heat this season. the prices are so high. it will cost me about $2000 to fill up my tank and that will only last me about 2 months if i use it every day. a new air conditioner and heating unit will cost about that much to install but i will also have the additional cost of electricity to run it. so i sit here in my blog room, shaking from the cold and feeling a little hopeless. on my floor, two of the toilets are running but i don't want to call a plumber until i decide what type of heating to use. if i go with oil, i'll need the plumber to come over and clean out the boiler. then, i can ask him to fix the toilets. so in the mean time, we shut off the water valve, after every flush. it does save us water, i guess, but it's a royal pain. i have been binging on chocolates and left over cakes all week long. i haven't really enjoyed myself, sleeping all day long and watching oprah and dr.phil reruns til 4:00 a.m. every night. i finally, stumbled out of bed this morning because the phone was ringing all morning long. i hadn't spoken to anyone for days and i finally, couldn't avoid it any longer. my friend's daughter gave birth last night to a boy after being told by the doctors that she was carrying a girl. i of course, was planning to go and visit the new mom sometime today. my friend from efrat called to let me know that she finally caught up with my blog. unfortunately, our conversation got cut short. i started to feel a little guilty that i hadn't been blogging all week. suddenly, my sister in zefat, starting texting me. i managed to answer and it was the first time that we successfully 'chatted' on computer for a while. at first she discussed going with me to visit the new baby. and then my sister started discussing the probability of having a thanksgiving dinner for the family. i said that i would go for it if everyone agreed to come over in the afternoon since thanksgiving is typically celebrated by day. my chabad family doesn't usually sit down to dinner before 9:00p.m. i guess it really doesn't matter what time we eat here because israeli's don't even know what thanksgiving is. anyway, she offered to order a whole turkey from the chabad supermarket, but we both agreed that it would never fit in an israeli oven. she said that she could stuff some turkey wings. i agreed with her that stuffing definitely, belonged on the thanksgiving menu. i wanted to recreate some of my mom's thanksgiving dishes this year because we all miss her. another friend agreed to come if it's a pot luck dinner. so i'll ask her to bring a dish or salad. i plan to make corn bread and pumpkin pie. while we were texting our menu ideas, my daughter-in-law called to ask if i could sit for the baby. i was in the middle of texting, and i wanted very much to get on my blog but i put it on hold. i opted for a hot shower and shampoo before going upstairs to sahar. and just as i was getting into the shower, i got a call from an old friend that i haven't seen in about eight years. she and her husband are on their way to zefat and want to stop by and say hello. they have never been to my house. you can imagine how i must feel, being about 20 pounds heavier, recovering from facial paralysis and looking around at all of the balagon in the house. what can you do? i ran to the bathroom and frantically started plucking out all of those unsightly chin and eyebrow hairs. i then, rubbed my face with oil of olay, changed bras, put on deodorant and vanilla scented oil. i threw on my 'fat girl' olive green, elastic waist, corduroy skirt with the new sweater that my nephew gave me last week. i managed to find a matching head scarf to wear. i caught a glimpse of my face which looks swollen from all of the binging this week. i straightened up the bathroom, and ran to the kitchen to make some muffins. but, i was all out of eggs, and corn meal and frankly, ideas. my freezer which is usually stocked, with leftover cakes and muffins is empty. the refrigerator is also empty and quite a mess. but, if i remember correctly, my friend is a health nut and doesn't eat sugar or honey. i did wash all of the dairy dishes that were piled up high in the dairy sink even though there wasn't enough hot water left in the kitchen. i can't even offer them any fruit, because i don't have any. i ran around the house sprinkling drops of geranium oil essence to cover up the dogie smell that my son keeps complaining about. it was way too cold to fill up a pail of water and do a sponger. i just thought of another detail of my personality to tell the homeopath. why is it always for me, all or nothing?