Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Not again

it is nearly 10:00 p.m. in the holy city of safed.  my son just picked up the kids.  they were here for eight hours.  that is a full day's work.  while I watched them, fed them, and kept them from beating on each other, I made chocolates for a family engagement party on Thursday.  my granddaughter did do arts and crafts as her brother built tiny Lego sets for two hours straight.  this enabled me to make a lot of chocolates.  one of my molds was defective and a lot of chocolates are less than pretty.  the newer mold was much clearer to read.  at first I thought it was the quality of chocolate that I melted; but in the end; I realized that it was definitely, the molds.

I volunteered to make a dinner for after the wedding so I made a bunch of chocolate bride and groom chocolates, too.  the mold broke in several places when I tried to empty it.  some of these bride and groom chocolates are also defective.  in the past I would be more perfect.  I gave up making chocolates years ago.  I did not have any patience today, either.  by the end of the day, I was finally getting into the rhythm of it all and they were coming out of the molds fairly easily and shiny. 

I lost track of how many I made.  I think for the initial party, when my son got married I made over 200.  I sent some over to the synagogue when my son was called to the Torah, as a bridegroom.  this time I stopped after 100.  I did  buy 4 bags of white chocolate chips, so I might just make a few more chocolates tomorrow.  I bought tiny cellophane baggies and silver and gold twists.  I will put them into the cellophane tomorrow.  it was a rainy and cold day anyway, so I didn't mind being indoors working.  I dreaded my grandson coming over while I made the chocolates because I knew that he wanted to help.   as it turns out, he was given a 400 piece set of Lego and he was quite into building it.

I did have to stop every moment to come and see what they were doing.  they run me ragged.  there is no such thing as coming to where I am.  and of course, I have to bring food and drinks and snacks over to them.  Israeli kids are rough. when they are good they are gold.  we had music going, and the kids were singing for hours.  it was a very serene couple of hours before the punching, screaming and yelling.  they are always so happy when they leave.  I am glad that I did the brunt of the chocolates today. 

I have been working on a hand made tutu for my friend's play.  I had no idea of how to make one.  I knew I had to make a circle and put a piece of elastic around it but I didn't know how to make it poufy.  I went online and watched a tutorial.  I opted for the slip not version and ended up cutting up hundreds of slips of tulle and attaching each one to the waist band elastic.  what a balagon!  I have it more, or less finished but I must reinforce the elastic band.  I also opted for making it a tie around.  the actress who is wearing it, cannot simply, pull it over her head.  it is all poufy and multi colored and looks very funny.  I want to sew a big ribbon around the waistband to make it even sillier.

I am pretty sure that I want to postpone my brain surgery til after pesach.  I will notify the hospital and see what they have to say about it.  I am under too much pressure about purim, the upcoming wedding, and  getting the house in order for pesach.  the kids are also busy now and won't have the time to help me out.  we shall see what will be.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Sliding Backwards

it is 9:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat.  it's been a while since I blogged.  I was busy running around town doing blood tests and EKGs and chest x-rays.   my son turned the big 30 and his wife threw him a surprise party downstairs.  I spent the day in the hospital in ramat gan seeing the nurse, anesthesiologist and surgeon from the neurological department.  I got cleared for brain surgery.  I got to see the unit and somehow I felt less afraid.

I came back to zefat in time to surprise my son with his extended family and friends.  I was pretty exhausted.  I kept the grandkids with me upstairs when they got tired and testy.  my daughter-in-law cleaned up and they left after 1:00 a.m.  I did not fall asleep that night.  I woke up feeling under the weather.  I made it to synagogue on Saturday morning but woke up on Sunday pretty ill.  I stayed in bed for days.  everyone told me that I had 8 days to recover before the surgery.  I knew that it would take more time to heal.  I didn't want to be pressured to make the date.

I relapsed every other day as I started to feel well and moved around.  I knew that it was just a virus but still didn't imagine going in for surgery.  on Friday I went to see the doctor.  I knew that it wasn't bronchial because I didn't feel that awful.  I've had pneumonia and bronchitis the last couple of winters.  I really wanted a doctor's letter to send to the hospital more than a diagnoses or prescription for some cough medicine.  I faxed the hospital on Sunday and felt immediately better.

I hope my friends and family, who sent me money aren't upset with me for cancelling the surgery.  most of my close friends and acquaintances here, have said it is all in the hands of the One above.  I think the majority consensus is that this tumor will simply go away by itself.  no one really wants me to undergo the surgery.  I even lined up three blood donors who donated a pint, each, in my name.  I am still feeling a bit weak and heady.  I have been minding the grandkids lately, and I find that I am bereft of any energy the next day.

when I have the slightest amount of energy, I cook meals and bake muffins to freeze.  my freezer is full.  I joked with my son and friends, that in the case I don't make it out of surgery, there is tons of food to feed the mourners.  sometimes, you got to laugh.  my son and daughter-in-law had planned to take me to the surgery and stay over until after the surgery.  they had already taken off form work.  I had to let them know right away that I was planning on cancelling for now.  I was not going to travel all the way to the center of the country to see the doctors there to be sent all the way back to zefat, when they deemed me unfit for surgery.

a new date has not yet been scheduled.  I am in no hurry.  I can't even think about it right now.  I still have one last mezuzah to take in to be checked.  I never made it to the lawyer to make a living will or change the name on the deed.  I have several repairs downstairs that didn't get taken care of, either. 

I have been trying to get a bit of alone time so I could see the inauguration and hear the speech.  I've seen snippets on the internet on Fox news.  I am disgusted by the Obamas, especially Michelle, and by most of the elitist leftist hollywood.  I have lived through a lot of presidents.  I was born at the tail end of the Eisenhower administration.  I was a preteen when Kennedy got assassinated.   I marched in Washington against the Vietnam war and I was a member of the women's lib movement on campus.  my family were devout democrats and yet I only voted once when I turned 18.  I never voted again.

somehow, I started leaning towards the right as I lived in Israel.  and now I am only concerned with the survival of my country.  the Jewish nation sees Trump as sort of a Messiah.  we can only wait and see and pray that he will bring help to the middle east.  I do not care about his theatrics.  I am a reality television junkie, anyway.  I was very pleased with his wife's dresses.  they were chic and modest.  I never liked Obama's wearing the gap.  the America that I knew does not exist today.  I guess that is the same for the world, too.  I am so over political correctiveness.  if that is even a word.  I don't know if trump will be able to whip the economy into shape or not.  Obama didn't achieve much.

I saw ellen DE generous thank him personally for making it possible to marry her wife.  will that be his major achievement after 8 years in office??  I am not a big fan.  he was no friend to Israel.  I am glad to see him gone.  I truly wonder if Trump will be able to unfreeze building in settlements, and make Jerusalem our official capital.  citizens born in Jerusalem do not have Israel posted on their passports.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Only In Israel

it is 8:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat.  I had an appointment to see my G.P at 9:00 a.m. this morning.  I knew there wasn't enough time to heat the water before going so I skipped my shower.  I got up at 8:00 a.m.  I was tired from Shabbat.  the gardener was here so I ran out to give him a cup of coffee.  that always leads to a nice conversation and before I knew it, I was already late for my doctor.

I decided to cab it and ended up waiting over a half an hour anyway.  I needed to discuss these borderline ST changes on my EKG and it looked like I might have a urinary tract infection.  although I didn't have any discomfort, the numbers were off the chart.  the doctor said that the ST changes wouldn't effect the surgery but I should avoid doing any intense exercising; as if that might happen, any time soon.  he also suggested that I do an echogram.

 I ran to the nurse to do a urine culture.  the results will only be in on Tuesday afternoon and I will be at the hospital meeting with the nurses and anesthesiologist.  it's okay.   my insurance carrier has an office at the hospital and I was planning on getting there a bit early to check out the test results.  I realized that I did not do the urine test correctly. I forgot to use the wipe.  anyhow, I just got back the results of today's urine test and it's right on the money! so I need to go back to the office tomorrow and get a copy of the good urine test.

I pulled out the letter from the hospital about being admitted for surgery and noticed something about bringing blood.  I asked the secretary to clarify what it meant, and I was informed that I needed to bring proof that 2 family members or friends had donated blood to the national blood bank.  I was taken aback for a moment. suddenly, a lady came up to me, in the hallway, to offer me her blood. it was surreal.  it turns out that she was a close friend and neighbor to a mutual friend of mine.  she wanted to help me.  however, no one knew where one can donate blood.  we were sent back to the nurse and she had never heard of such a thing.

we called the paramedics and they didn't know.  I don't recall if we called the hospital in zefat.  finally, this lady called my hospital and was told that a mobile unit visits each town.  as it turns out, the mobile unit is coming to zefat on Tuesday.  I asked this lady if I could give her a big hug.  only in Israel will a stranger offer you her blood.  I exchanged phone numbers with the lady and ran off to town to do the echogram. I had completely forgotten that I had left the dogs outside to run to the doctor.  I guess, I had expected to come back right away.

I got an appointment to do the echogram on January 16th.  I go to the hospital on the 17th.  apparently, I will get the results on the spot.  I thought it was rather strange to be in town without my pocketbook and spending money.  I had forgotten that I hadn't planned on going to town.  I ran to the party store to buy a bunch of soccer themed items for my son's birthday.  he turns 30 on Tuesday night.  I ran out of money and had to go back into town to the cash machine.  I bought myself slippers for the hospital stay.

 I stopped at my son's gallery to let him know that I need him to donate blood.  my son has a long history of being afraid of needles and blood tests. I knew that he wouldn't be able to do this. I had thought that in this case, he might muster up the courage to, but in the end, his father-in-law will donate blood in his place. he feels a bit ashamed, I'm sure.  a mother would not hesitate.

I stopped off at my friends' house to inquire about the MRI results.  I believe he was staged at 2.  I, on the other hand, was never told my stage by any of my doctors.  ignorance is bliss.  my friend was nervous about her husband not being given a date to meet with the radiologist.  her husband was bent under the sink cabinet fixing a clogged pipe and was busy barking orders at us to turn on the outside hose.  I took the initiative and I called the hospital on their behalf.  I'm good at being a pest.  I finally got through and was given the date.  I wish I could go with them for their first appointment but they are staying over at relatives and I will have to report to the hospital the following week.  it may be a bit too much travelling for me. it's definitely a dilemma.

in the meanwhile, my daughter-in-law called me to reassure me that they were planning on being with me 24/7.  they will stay with me until they know I am safe and in a good place.  we will all have to sit down and discuss the logistics after I see the anesthesiologist.  I have to say that it made me feel loved and cherished.  I am resigned to my fate, whatever that may entail. I have given it up to a higher power.