Enough Is Enough

it is 8:30 a.m. in the holy city of safed.  i took the dogs out at 6:00 a.m.  i had a hard time falling asleep even though i was tired.  i was plagued with worries about my health issues and finances.  i am worried about the kids, too.  i woke up with a dry cough.  i also have a headache.  i have been feeling tingling in my body, also.  i just read that these could be signs of the rona.  i also read the news and nearly went ballistic.  it just seems that no one really knows everything about this virus.  they probably aren't saying anyway; to prevent a mass panic and more suicides.

i finally did the week's washing up.  i did all the tea cups and pots and pans.  i am fed up with being home and i am fed up with being scared.  i am taking antibiotics for a bad tooth problem and i'm sure it is compromising, my already compromised, immune system.  the elixir that i'm drinking every morning is bogus.  the surgical masks that i wear outside are also bogus.  the news is bogus and i can't feel safe. 

i was planning to go to the cemetery to light a candle at my parents' graves.  i am afraid of coughing in the taxi or on the bus.  i don't want to create a panic.  it is sunny today and it seems warm.  the house is freezing and i'm shaking from the cold.  i read that it is also a sign of the virus.  i'm about to lose my mind.  i think that i might need a valium.  my headache is on my left side which could be a neurological symptom of my brain tumor; which is on my right side.  it could also be from the infection in my gum on the left side of my mouth.

 my friend has been running back and forth to the clinic for the past few weeks with an eye infection.  she has another appointment this morning because it has spread to the other eye.  she was sent to the hospital last week for a thorough examination.   she was given more eye drops and told that it was just an infection.  she was tortured at the beginning fearing that it could be the rona.  apparently, conjunctivitis can spread the virus.

on my walk this morning; i saw many badgers sitting upright on rocks near the valley at the end of the street.  it was like a scene out of the lion king.  they usually hide in the bushes and stay away from people.  i counted more than ten this morning.  i usually only see one.  at first, i thought that i was seeing things.  i also saw a large hedgehog in the downstairs garden.  I've seen a few of them in the public parks lately.  i haven't seen any mongoose lately.  they are pretty docile.

we had one at the yeshiva and the guys named him Patrick.  i read that they make decent pets.  i used to feed Patrick.  he used to lie around the courtyard with the cats.  he was afraid of them.  one time, as i sat on the ground; making a shopping list, he snuggled close to me.  i tried not to move much.  he suddenly bit me on my arm.  it was just a love bite like cats do.  it was however, pretty strange.

i think i will take a hot shower and try to feel calm and warm.  i have a bunch of hand washing to do in the bathtub. i don't feel kike getting my cloths wet right now.  my headache is probably from the barometric pressure dropping.  the frightening thing is that it is on the left side.  i usually get headaches on my right side.  oh well.....