Taking A Break

it is 2:30 p.m. in the holy city of zefat.  I just made some bulgur and red lentils for tonight's Shabbat meal.  I'm defrosting a package of ground turkey and will make a pot of meatballs for myself and the pooches.  I am planning on being alone for Shabbat, once again.  I ran out a little while ago and bought some whole wheat pitas for Shabbat at the local bakery.  I opted not to hit the supermarket.

 it is hot as blazers outside.   I will stay in for Shabbat.  I have a few fans running right now and all the windows are shut.  we have been having wonderful breezes at night but I think we are in the midst of yet, another desert heat wave.  it's truly unbearable.  I somehow managed to pull a shoulder muscle the other day by bending over to pick up a needle from the ground.  my back has more or less healed from this week's fall but this recent pull has me very limited, indeed.

I didn't make it to my friend's video shoot because I couldn't get out of bed yesterday.   I couldn't raise my arm to change into clothes, either.  my costumes were a huge success.  I hope to be able to post some pix soon.   my friend had wanted me to come up with a gray coat depicted in the folk song she had recorded about the legendary 18th century huntsman, john peel.  her video is a comedic twist on the traditional fox hunt.  they already acquired a very adorable fuzzy gray fox hand puppet and I supplied the hats and 'coats' for the dogs.

I had a grey hound's-tooth hat that worked well and we added a feather.  it was my dad's hat.  I had kept it in my closet for the past 12 years after he passed.  I also took out his grey hounds- tooth gabardine robe and offered that too.  in the end, it needed far too much work to turn it into a proper hunting jacket costume.  I ran over to a friend's house and rummaged through her husband's wardrobe, to find a gray jacket.  no such luck.  he did offer me a tailored navy blue jacket with a black velvet collar.  it somehow, had a royal look about it and I immediately knew that it was the costume for john peel.

I was way too hyper to sleep that night.  I stayed up until around 5:00 a.m. considering my possibilities.  I ended up cutting off the pockets and cuffs of the gabardine robe to add a touch of hounds-tooth material to the navy blue blazer.  I also cut strips of black velvet from an old dress to sew onto the jacket, too.  I played around with all the bits and pieces of gabardine material for hours.   I woke up and got to work at around 9:30 a.m.

I still had another two dog hats to create which had to be different from the original 3 hats that I had already made.  I found a silver metal crown that had fallen off of a tsaduka box and I sold in onto the jacket's lapel.  it already had a 'dandy' look bout it.  I was never truly satisfied with my creation but my friend loved it and the young man playing john peel, asked if he could keep the jacket.

I got to make a costume and do a mitzvah at the same time.  my friends wanted me to find a young man to give the jacket and suit to.  mission accomplished!  most important, I got out of my house all week and I didn't have time to brood over the current situation at home.  I was appreciated too, for all my hard work and creativity.  I didn't feel like such a schlepper.  I would have loved to show the grandkids the dog's costumes, but it wasn't meant to be.

I saw the grandkids yesterday in the evening after my friend had already left with the hats.  one of the hats needed a new quill.  I made the repair quickly and my friend and I watched 'the umbrellas of Cherbourg'' in the computer room.   I then walked her over to the bus stop.  you could hear a lot of crying and a lot of screaming coming from the downstairs.  in the past, I would have intervened but not now.  I stopped off at my other friends' home and had a bit of supper.

when I got back I heard the kids downstairs.  I called down to my granddaughter.  she came running over to hug me.  they truly miss me.  my granddaughter was showering me with kisses as my grandson told me how he was starting first grade soon.  they both sat on my lap while I held onto them.  their 19 year old aunt, the bulldog, ordered them back inside.  I could have sworn that she called her sister, the daughter-in-law, to inform on me.  she pointed to her watch impatiently as if to instruct me on the importance of their being showered that moment.  after all, it was 8:00 p.m. on a summer night.  these kids haven't come back home all week before 11:00 p.m.

my daughter-in-law is in charge.  they are, after all, her kids.  she decides who gets to watch them.  I guess I am supposed to kiss her behind that she let me take care of them for the past seven years on a full time basis.  but now, I'm taking a break.  that is my new mantra.  I am taking time off from babysitting and cooking Shabbat meals.  I am taking time off from the drama and the disrespect and the chutzpah.   ultimately, the little kids will survive without me.  they have two parents and a set of grandparents and five aunts and three uncles.   I am alone here.  I am the odd woman out.