Saturday, August 11, 2012

The Shabbat That Didn't

it is 9:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat. i haven't been able to blog lately. i have simply, been too tired. i have been cooking and standing on my feet for a minimun of 5 hours a day at the yeshiva. i have come back home every day to rest a bit. i have passed out on my t.v. couch each day from the heat. i have roused myself from the deep sleep at night fall and have been up all night, subsequently. i was not able to do anything in my home. house cleaning and laundry was out of the equasion.

i had friends visiting from efrat and they arrived a day early. i had the utmost intention of doing a thorough cleaning job before they came. they landed right in the midst of zelda's house of chaos. luckily, i had managed to buy some bread, cheese and milk for breakfast. i get to see these friends once a year. i had hoped to make a festive evening and invite some friends over for a barbecue. my friends had other ideas. they were planning on going over to teveria for a couple of days of hot baths and chinese food.

i was quite frustrated. i had to work the next day and they were planning on leaving after noon. i suggested that they stay for an early barbecue before leaving, and they agreed. i went on to work and produced 3 meals in rapid fire time. i was finished by 1:00 p.m. i completed it all in about 3 and 1/2 hours. a new record for me. of course, i didn't bother baking any kugels, or making anything complicated. i got back around 1:30 p.m. and the grandkids had already been dropped off. a good friend was holding the princess when i arrived.

i took the kids outside to fill up the kiddie pool. they splash around and i get wet and cool off. it's a win/win situation. my son and his friend went out for quite a while. they came back with fresh steak and lamb chops. i had put out spicy franks, kabobs, chicken wings, and chicken steaks. i guess, that wasn't quite good enough for my son. my grandson wanted marshmallows. they were all out of them at the supermarket in town. i had stood on line for 15 minutes just to buy coals. i even took a cab home to get back as quickly as i could.

the guys did all the work while we women, sat outside in the shade. it was a delicious meal. my friends got ready to leave right after we ate. i was left with the kids. my son told me, after a few beers, that he had lost his job. i was rather perturbed. he went home to 'chill' right after the barbecue. they came to pick up the kids after 9:00 p.m. both kiddies were fast asleep. i was ready to collapse.

i went to work the next day in a state of extreme fatigue. i could barely speak. my son called to ask me to babysit after work. he arranged for his wife to pick me up in town at 3:00 p.m. i was under enormous pressure to finish cooking. i had visited the senior's center for a few hours that day and had only returned to work at 1:00 p.m. lunch is served at 2:00 p.m. i stopped off at the supermarket to buy some eggs. i quickly fried up some onions and canned mushrooms to make an enormous pot of scrambled eggs. i reheated some pumpkin soup from the night before. i cooked up a bunch of carrots and onions and added it to the left over couscous from breakfast, that no one ate. i also reheated the rest of the macaroni in tomato sauce, from the day before. i sliced up a lot of tomatoes and onions for a salad and the guys had one hell of a lunch.

i still had to make dinner and get out of there by 3:00 p.m. i had a lot of pots to wash, too. i decided to make spaghetti. i know that it isn't the most nutritional of foods and i know that the kid who doesn't eat white flour would be out of luck. and yet, i went for it. one of the other young men on a specialized diet, was hoping that i would make some rice. i didn't. i couldn't. i simply, was running out of time. spaghetti was the fastest thing to make. rice would take too long. i was out of bulgar and i had already served couscous twice that day. usually, i would make a side dish of lentils, but i didn't. i quickly threw the rest of the canned mushrooms into a pot with onions and a lot of garlic and ginger and dried chili peppers and added soy sauce. i made some kind of salad and ran out the door.

i had the kids until 9:00 p.m. the baby was in my arms all day. my grandson was hyper and overtired. i was beside myself with exhaustion. i wanted to relax. i wanted the kids to come and pick up their kids. i wanted to lie down. i wanted to cry. the kids finally arrived with a present for me. it was a very belated birthday gift. it was a huge mahagony photo stand with current pix of both grandkids and their parents. the kids wanted to know if i liked it. i just wanted them all to disappear. my son let me know that they would be coming for shabbat. didn't i know??

i woke up and ran to the little supermarket first thing on friday morning. i had some fish in the freezer. that was about it. i bought challahs, milk, 4 kinds of drinks, grape jiuce, fresh corn, potatoes, chicken, packaged smoked turkey, icecream and two kinds of ices, tomatoes and cucumbers, melon , almonds and sunflower seeds. it came out to 350 shekels. i was able to make two payments. i had to take a cab home. it was too much for me to carry. i had just gotten home and undressed, when my son called for me to babysit. he was out on his newspaper route and his wife had to get to her new job. i told her to bring the kids over.

i got another call from my son asking me to please just 'jump over' to their place. i was only supposed to stay until my son returned from his work at 9:00 a.m. i threw on my clothes and ran over to their apartment. my son didn't get home until 10:30 a.m. he wanted me to stay a little longer. he needed to shower, daven, and have breakfast. he then received a job offer from another winery in the same area where he had been employed. he was very elated. he needed to 'chill' and have a beer. he asked me to take the kids back to my house so he could relax. my grandson was super hyper and acting aggressive. i thought a pool would calm him down. i told my son to come around 100 a.m. to get the kids.

at 2:00 my granson fell asleep. the baby was another story. my daughter-in-law came to get the kids at 2:30 p.m. i gave her the baby and told her that my son should pick up his son when he woke up. i managed to make the chicken and fish while sahar slept. my son came to get him around 3:30 p.m. i scrambled to finish the shabbat meals. i made a honey cake, fresh corn, a mashed potato kugel with mushrooms and onions, couscous from the box, and an israeli salad. i even, opened a can of artichoke bottoms and made a vinagrette. i quickly picked up all the scattered toys and wet mopped the apartment. there was no time left to throw around any water. i set the table and lit my candles.

i was too tired to go to shul for evening services. the kids came around 8:30 p.m. we sat down to dinner and my daughter-in-law immediately, went into a tirade about why my son hadn't taken care of the kids that day. when he called to tell her that he was starting a new job, all she had to say was that there was no one to take care of the kids next week. her family was going away for the week. there was no mazal tov from her lips. i called up a friend to ask her to help me with the kids but that wasn't okay with 'queenie'.

after a while of her badgering my son, he left the shabbos table to lie down. he suddenly, wasn't feeling well. i had just served the chicken. my daughter-in-law was not happy being alone at the table with me. i served her tea and cake and she wanted to go home. they were here for about an hour until they left. my grandson wanted to sleep here but queenie didn't let. they left and i collapsed into bed.

i woke with a migraine this morning. any wonder? i had some coffee and cake but i couldn't daven. instead i read psalms. i took the dogs out and then put the food on the electric platter to heat up. i cut up a fresh israeli salad and went to bed. my daughter-in-law arrived with the kids around 11:00 a.m. she was a bit miffed that my son hadn't come back from shul. we sat for a while in the living room with the kids. she was getting bent out of shape that he still hadn't returned. i knew that he was retaliating from last night's tongue whipping, and wouldn't be coming back any time soon.

i suggested that we have some potato kugel and salad until he returned to make kiddush. she wasn't having any of it. she got up to leave. he returned at 1:00 p.m. and she left with the baby. no goodbye, no apology, no no nannette. my son was trashed. he looked disheveled. i was beside myself. all the food was still sitting on the blecht. i gave him his son's shoes and asked him how he could disrespect us like that. he just said that he didn't do anything. he left with my grandson and i was a bit concerned for his safety. i couldn't relax. i was fit to be tied. i tried to daven. i made kiddush but got nauseated at the thought of food.

i ate an entire box of icecream and almost finished the cake. how's that for self punishment? i spent the day aggravated and worried for this couple. i finally passed out for a bit. i awoke unrested. the migraine was stil there. i am truly fed up with their poor behavior. i think i am going to unplug the phone for a few days. let them deal on their own. i am finished!!!

1 comment:

  1. I read and marvel at how you let them take advantage of you while you have the joy of being with your grandckids but you have to respect yourself enough to say to them NO at times. I'm glad you have a kesher again but not at the expense of your emotions and sanity.