Just Another Friday Morning

it is 9:00 a.m. in the holy city of safed.  I got up an hour ago.  I cleaned the ceiling fan.  I am pretty tired.  I had a banana and a piece of the noodle kugel that I made last night.  I'm trying to stay away from carbs but I am hungry.  in the good old days when I was thin, I would live on the peanut snack, bamba for weeks.  usually I lose weight before pesach but this stomach isn't shrinking.  I am feeling even more pressured because I have the grandkids for 3 days next week.  the adult kids are off to the center of the country to do some kind of business venture.  I am pretty along with my pesach cleaning.  I am not going to do a thing today.  my back is aching.  I have two cabinets to wipe down in the kitchen but it will have to wait until sunday morning.

I bought chopped turkey and am going to make a shepherd's pie for Shabbat lunch.  it is probably tastier with beef but I didn't want to spend the extra money for it.  I have spent a small fortune on pesach already and I still need to buy matzoth and vegetables and fruits.  I'm beginning to think that maybe the family won't be here for part of pesach so I will shop accordingly.  it is going to be a very quiet pesach, I think. 

I have to learn to adapt.  I am too rigid.  now I know why people wait until the last moment.  I have my freezer filled already with pesach poultry and meat.  it won't go to waste.  i'll use it sometime. my mother had a friend who always had pesach done right after purim.  at 99 she was still doing her own thing.  I guess I feel that I am on a race to do things before my brain tumor kicks in.  it's not the healthiest way to live.

I've decided to roast the chicken in a pan.  I haven't done this in years.  I hope it will turn out all right.  if not, tiny dog will have tons to eat next week.  my son thought that I might need a puppy so he went to the neighbors to check out one.  luckily for me, it had already gone to the pound.  I probably would have kept it.  I am a sucker for dogs.  I, however, am trapped by owning a dog.  I can't travel.  if I do my surgery, I do have a friend who will stay here for a week with my dog. I guess she would help me out for a day or two, in a pinch.  my mind is racing a mile a minute but my poor old body can't keep up.