Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Parenting

it is 11:30 a.m.in the holy city od zefat. the cold wave finally ended today. i heard it was -13 celcius in the holy land. they say it was the coldest in the history of the state. it is a brisk sunny day and i am catching up on laundry. i thought about using the dryer but i ended up hanging it all up outside in the sun. a bottle of olive oil froze on my kitchen counter which shows you how cold it was in the house. i have already shed a few undergarments today. i'm only wearing:knee socks, exercize tights, legwarmers and woolen house boots on the legs today. my arms are cold without the heavy sweater that i took off. i didn't need a coat in the sun downstairs. yesterday i wore a fur hat and down coat and still, couldn't deal with the cold. the house is freezing. we do not have central heating. we use space heaters in individual rooms. unless you are sitting in front of a hater you never are warm. the stone houses are not insulated and do not maintain heat. i had a horrific day with the kids yesterday. when i picked up my grandson i was told that he had maliciously scratched another boy on the face, drawing blood. i hardlly had the time to digest the news when he attacked his sister at home. apparently, she was teasing him and he punched her on the back several times. i got him distracted for a time until he once again, beat her on the back and started to bite her on the face and head. i quickly hit him hard on the head to get him off of her. she was zcreaming bloody murder. and he started to scream after i hit him. i know it was wrong to hit him on the head. i also potched his behind very hard. the 3 year old girl was hysterically crying and the 5 year old boy turned on me. i wanted him to go into his room for a rime out. he threw things at me and hit me several times. he started screaming like a maniac while the kittle girl kept on crying. i put up my hands to protect myself from flying objects and physical blows. i couldn't lift him and drag him away. he is a very strong and heavy little boy. i felt useless. somehow, i persuaded him to let me hold him and carry him into the bedroom for a time out. i explained that he needed some time alone to think about what happened and to chill out. i never raised my voice. i was thoroughly freaked out that i couldn't hold my own, physically, with a 5 year old child. he seemed quite alright in his room. it took awhile to calm down the 3 year old. my grandson brutally bit his sister on her back the day before. i never reported it to his parents. they came home late from work. i started to imagine the future of the 5 year old bully. i know i am a drama queen but i can't stand violence. i called the daughter-in-law at work to ask if they were going to a parenting class that evening. i told her to discuss this recent violent behavior. the big kids came home after 9:00 p.m. the little kids had been good the rest of the day and were getting along great together. i had expected the parents to come home immediately after the parenting class to deal with the situation. it was way past the little kids' bedtime when they finally came home. i guess they expected the kids to already be asleep. i was disappointed once agian, by the lack of interest, i perceived on their part. they both spoke to my grandson who seemed ashamed of his behavior. i feel it was too little and too late. his mother said that her boy's scratching another boy was probably out of provocation. she said that in parenting class they said that kids were violent at all ages. they claimed that biting was normal up until 5 or 6 years old. parenting has sure changed since i was a mom. i'm sure Doctor spock wouldn't agree with today's parenting advice. the dad,my son, accused me of being overly dramatic. if i refuse to take care of the kids they might get the message. i don't know why i do not evoke fear in my grandchildren or my dogs. they all do as they please. they all order me around like i am their servant. i guess i am not very good at parenting now and probably i never was.

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