Almost Free

it is 5:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat.  I made some chicken this morning because I thought the kids were coming for Shabbat.  my son called to say that they had made other plans.  I was so delighted not to have to cook.  I ate a couple of wings and sighed in relief.  'free at last'.  I thought about going to my friends for lunch and I contemplated visiting my sister.  my niece has been here from India for almost 3 weeks and I haven't yet seen her or her family.

I haven't heard a word from my sister, either.  I assume it is sheer havoc with everyone camped out in her tiny apartment.  I often feel guilty at times like these that I live in a 3 floor, 11 room house.  it does seem unfair.  my son and wife and their two kids do occupy the bottom floor. they cannot afford today's rentals on both of their minimum income wages.  that's also very unfair but very true.

I offered my single niece the chance to live upstairs in the roof top studio apartment.  she never took me up on my offer.  a few years ago my sister called me at the last moment to ask if my nephew and his new wife could sleep upstairs for a Shabbat.  I had to decline.  I felt awful.  the apartment was trashed with pigeon poo.  it was a major cleanup job.  there were pigeons everywhere and in the walls.  the noise was unbearable.  the smell was awful, too.

I finally got the upstairs in shape before pesach.  I had someone close off the open areas where they were getting in.  the place was spotless until recently when I discovered a pigeon roosting on my electric burner stove top.  I haven't had the strength to clean it yet.  I left the nest sans eggs and the pigeon poo all over the fridge and floor.  one of these days......

the fact is that I've been feeling awful in this heat wave.  I have been dizzy and truly fatigued.  I mentioned it to the oncologist but he wasn't particularly concerned.  I just do not fare well in the heat.  when it cools down I feel that I may just live.  I have been too tired in the evenings to do anything.  I'm housebound mostly.  I put off doing all of my errands until I must deal with them.

it turns out that the kids will be coming home for lunch.  I think i'll serve them the chicken that I made today.  I was thinking about doing schnitzels but I don't know now if I feel like it.  I don't like their switching on me once again.  just when I fell free they put me back in my cage.  I don't know if i'll join them at the clans' on Friday night.  it is always so loud there.  my grandson gets absolutely off the wall there.  and then we have a long walk home and leaving there is always a production.

the Sephardi grandma had a birthday on Tuesday night and I didn't go to the party.  I was feeling fatigued.  I couldn't get dressed.  I was lying in a prone position on my t.v. sofa with 2 or 3 dogs lying on top of me.  right now I'm feeling a bit dizzy.  it's quite windy outside.  the daughter-in-law promised to get me veggies for Shabbat.  I'm plum out of cash.  I really don't feel like tackling the supermarket later.

I am turning 64 next Wednesday.  I do not want a surprise party.  I do not want the clan coming over.  I want to have a small ladies soiree for Rosh Chodesh.  I am planning on serving turkey chili and  spicy chicken wings.  I plan to do cornbread, salsa, salad and chocolate non dairy ice cream.  hopefully, i'll find a couple of ripe avocados.  if they have a sale I might just be tempted to buy non dairy ice cream.   I bought two very inexpensive bottles of rose wine to make sangria.  unfortunately, fresh grapes, peaches, melon and frozen strawberries and raspberries are all very pricey.  I'll have to stick with oranges, lemons and apples.

as usual, I've been online looking up recipes.  I am fixed on doing a Mexican menu.  I really don't know anything about the food.  almost every recipe calls for cheese so that leaves it out since we are having fowl.  as you might know already, we orthodox Jews, do not eat meat with dairy.  I wanted to do a flan but it is too complicated.  I decided on chocolate pudding.  I feel the need to add cinnamon even though I just know that my guests won't really get off on it. 

I have a new recipe for non dairy eggless ice cream.  I usually make it with a melted chocolate bar, 3 eggs and a container of Riches non dairy whipping cream.  it's fast and yummy.  even better when I have some rum around the house.  I don't know why I'm trying a new recipe out.  didn't I learn my lesson on Shavuot?  the recipes call for sweetened condensed milk.  I found a blogger that swears that cream of coconut is a good non dairy substitute.  the recipe also calls for cocoa and not a chocolate bar.  I'm truly in a dilemma as to what to do.  my friend is buying a fancy birthday cake.

I'll go to the supermarket and see what I can find. hopefully, i'll get inspired.