Much To Do About Nothing

it is 4:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat.   it has been a nice and sunny day.  i didn't venture out.   i haven't left the house this week at all.  i haven't even gotten dressed this week.  i've been relatively pain free, thanks to the recent remedy that i took.  however, i have been incredibly tired.   i  convinced myself that i have chronic fatigue.  the homeopath believed me and fashioned the remedy to improve it.  i don't think that phase has kicked in.  i am terribly exhausted from doing nothing.

i keep on waiting for some energy to kick in.  i need a shower and i need a change of clothes. it's so simple really, but so difficult for me.  i lay in bed for most of the day watching reruns on the telly.  it has been rather cold so i've been under the goose down comfortor with the dogs all week.  i  constantly think about making a move.  and then i fall asleep.

my gradson has been coming up each morning at 7:00 a.m.  he watches the telly while i prepare him some hot chocolate or hot milk with honey.  this morning i made them both bottles of carob milk.  i had a whole bag of organic carob powder left over form tu b'shvat.  from what i read, i think that dutch cocoa powder is probably more healthy than carob and it does taste richer.  the carob powder is naturally sweet.  any way, i managed to slip in some carob into their morning drinks.  i actually lifted the boy today,  a real testament to my recent welllness.  even he mentioned that his 'safta' was pain free again.

i sometimes help the kids get dressed.  this morning i got the definate vibe from the daughter-in-law that she didn't appreciate my being around.  i, anyway, come up each day for my morning fix of 'new jersey housewives' at 8:00 a.m.  i am a housewives junkie.  i can't get enough of these series.  i always imagined doing a zefat housewives show.   it would really make for a great satire on purim, but i don't think the general populace here would get it.  oh well!  thinking about purim makes me tired.  i don't think there will be tons of my home made rum balls or hamentashen this year.

i have a good buddy who has been calling every day in crisis mode.  does she have rats in the house? no. does she have a huge electric bill to pay?  nope.  does she have a health crisis like cancer?  once again, no. she is a wannabe singer/performer.  she actually did have a real career back in the days.  however, she packed that all in back in the 80's.  she really is a talented cometic writer.   we used to perform for the ladies at purim and chanukah but we haven't pulled off any thing  in years.  i was always the costume designer.  i still have an extensive wardrobe of costumes and props in my blog room..

anyway, my freind still wants to have a career in the music world.  i do encourage her to write songs and make videos to show on you tube.  afterall, that is the musical climate these days.  do i think that she has a chance to make it in the real world of music?  not a one.   they recently had try outs for the israeli 'x'  factor. even my son, the  kareoke maven, tried out.  did i think that he had a chance of making it?  no, not a one.  neither one got a call back.  nebech!  my friend hasn't really gotten over being rejected from the show.  how am i supposed to really relate to her ayway?  i can't get out of bed.  i can't drag my behind out of the house.  i  sometimes feel like playing up the cancer card but it doesn't really work any more.

my zefat sister and i had words before shabbat.  it was pretty much the same dance that we have been doing all these years.  i always get attacked for being judgemental and not allowing her to 'express' herself.  i have no patience for it anymore.  i cannot engage.  i have chronic fatigue from all the radiation i received last year. leave me alone.  my other sister, the voice of reason, has been suffering from similar back and leg pain lately, too.  she takes motrain and runs off to the gym to do planks, and plunges and tread mill.  she doesn't lie in bed all day like her younger sister.  does anyone really care?

i heard from the california chapter, that my zefat nephew was accepted into med school in n.y.  do you think the zefat chapter would go out of their way to spread the good news?  not a chance.  that is the way things are.  many years ago, i got a call from my california sister letting me know about a crisis my son was having right here in zefat.  did i get a local call?  of course not.  why can't  i just accept that things are the way they are and can't seem to change?   it was all so simple when i was undergoing treatment.    now that i'm cancer free, i can't  get anyone to give me the time of day.

i heard from the west coast connection that certain readers/ extended family members were happy to read the blog once again.  i am happy to know that people are reading my blog.  i would love to meet everyone some day.  i extend an open invite to anyone who happens to find themselves in zefat to come over and dine with me.  we have sleeping space too.  try to come when it's warm.  the house is a virtual ice box  this winter.

the son wants to renew his american passport thos month.  he wants me to schepp with him to haifa.  ain't happening.  he needs photos to prove his identity through the past years.  i haven't  really kept up but i do have some photos that may help.  i keep on thinking that the boy wants to escape to the states.  who knows?  i'm not going anywhere.